It's been several weeks since I have done a weekly blog. Ya'll haven't missed a thing. Lots of work, lots of complaining about low-carb, my shins hurt all the time, and I am catching up on all of my shows, so I sit at home a lot.
The most exciting thing that has happened lately?
I get a message when I am in Walgreens:
"Did you know that Lily was in the ER? Don't panic. She has a carrot stuck up her nose."
Walgreens is just across the street from the hospital so we went over there.
I walk in, Lily and Rebecca are sitting there. She said "EESA!! You here!" and her "here" sounds like "HE-UH".
I said "LIL! What did you do?!", and she said "Me stuck a cawwot in my nose"
Rebecca says it best in her own words:
Let me set the scene for you... I'm sitting at my kitchen table, organizing my music library on my laptop. My daughter is in the living room (open concept house, so we're essentially in the same room) watching Bubble Guppies. She keeps going back and forth from the refrigerator eating out of the vegetable platter that she insisted on bringing home from the grocery store. Then she comes over to me and mumbles something about a carrot and her nose. *Wat* "You put a carrot in your nose?!?" "No mama." *Phew* "I put a piece of a carrot in my nose!"
So I look inside her nose and there is indeed a piece of a carrot stuck up there. And it's pretty damn deep. Like I can barely see it. Apparently she just pushed it until her stubby little finger couldn't reach it anymore. So I'm all "Dude , we have to go to the hospital right now" Which makes her start freaking out because she's scared to go. So I make an attempt to get it out myself. I tried tweezers, a q-tip, a toothpick, making her smell pepper and sneeze, nothing was working. So I'm starting to panic and all I can think is "Didn't I see this on tv once?? Why is my life turning into a sitcom???"
So I put on a bra (because I'm classy like that), throw some clothes on her (that I'm assuming were clean) and texted my husband and my mother where I was going. Thank God I was wearing yoga capris and not my usual plaid pajama pants. Thankfully, we were the only ones in the waiting room, so it didn't take very long. And after about 5 minutes of picking and pulling, the carrot was set free!
Now, I know it doesn't look very large, but you have to remember that she has very tiny toddler nostrils haha. And it was raw, so it was very hard. I'm also not sure why they put it in a cup and gave it to me? But you will be pleased to know that after showing everyone I know, (including Facebook because apparently I'm gonna be that mom) I did indeed throw it away...
I am still on the low-carb way of life. I haven't been blogging it, but I do have the documentation and pics to write the blog if that counts for anything.
14 pounds down so far, but nothing in the blood sugar department. It remains in the low to mid 200's. ONCE it was 112. For like 4 hours. My A1C is down though, and that is what matters the most.
I blogged a few recipes:
The Bombdiggiest Caesar Salad
Beef and Slaw Stir Fry
Ham, Cheese, and Egg Roll Ups
Spectacular Slow Cooker Cube Steak
Ugly Zucchini "Pizza" Bites
Steak and Mushroom Bites
A Tale of Two Broccoli Casseroles
I fell down the stairs at work.
It was quite embarrassing for people to see me limping with a head bruise and me not having a cool story to accommodate. No bar fight, no saving a nun from a fire....my knee gave out while I was walking down the stairs. I feel knee first on the corner of the stair, and hit my head on the rail.
Books 5, 6, 7, 8 of my 50 goal for the year!
Death Comes to Town by K.J. Emrick
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Sometimes I get overwhelmed with all of the "heavy" books I read, and I need something light. There is still murder of course, but nothing like the serial killer+forensics+save the world books I am used to. I am looking forward to more in this series.
View all my reviews
I screenshotted a bunch of pics......
I read once that if you get ink on your clothes, that toothpaste and a toothbrush will get it right out.
It is true!
But then, you get to go through the rest of the day like this:
Our hand dryer is a fancy Dyson one that when you have to have both hands in it to activate it. I have tried many times to dry my shirt, because I am always looking like my water broke.
I ended up getting a hair dryer and taking off my shirt in my office.
No one thought it was weird I had a hair dryer going with my door closed.
They've been around me too long.
One thing that I discovered I can only get in Alabama?
Diet Grapico. It's bottled by Buffalo Rock, and found only in certain areas of the state.
I have tried unseccessfully to order it from various places, the shipping costs that I have found the cheapest? $39.95. Per case. That was from the Buffalo Rock site itself.
Luckily, I whine about it enough to all of the Guests that are coming from Alabama, and a sweetheart brought me not only TWO cases, but two Alabama koozies.
I was way more excited than Scott, and they are for him!
I end with not one, but two tornados.
On a Friday night we were alarmed of bad weather. Phones were charged, a/c was turned down, everyone was watching the news. Around 10:00pm it got bad. Like....bad.
I think Scott was trying to be macho, but he kept insisting that we go to the hotel so "I would feel safer".
I didn't want to get out in it, but I put on shoes and we went. It wasn't so much the rain but the wind. There was debris all over the highway, and we met no cars that I thought was weird, but hey, we were in a tornado warning. We get within a half mile of where you turn off our highway onto the highway that the hotel is on.
Annnnnd......there is a tree across the road.
No way in, no way out. No wonder we didn't meet anyone!
We had to turn around and go back. The power was out, my phone was dwindling down, and I was eating peanut butter straight from the jar.
I was calming down, and then I get a text from my Mother.
Like I wasn't already. And then....
"Bailey is on her way home".
I explained the tree was across the road and she had no way to get home. She needed to go to the hotel, or stay wherever she was.
Then I had a mini panic attack until I knew she was somewhere safe. But not THAT safe! A confirmed tornado touchdown hit right where she was. My boss lady's house suffered damage, her daughter's house, that she has only been in a couple of months, a tree went right through it. Many, many homes and vehicles are still currently tore up.
Tarps everywhere from this storm as I type.
I kept heckling Bailey until I knew she was safe and was going to stay somewhere overnight.
Our power was out for 15 hours. It wasn't bad, I got a lot of laundry folded and put up.
But thank the Lord when it came back on.
Bailey finally made it home.
3 days later, the tornado watch is back, horrendous rain and winds.
I am kinda freaked out, but chill for the most part.
THEN!, Bailey SnapChats me, "If I get stuck in another tornado, Imma be pissed".
I said "MY LORD, don't you ever stay at home!!!!".
She made it safely.
So we're getting back into our groove, and then boom. Sunday. Tornadoes ERR'Where.
At the hotel we had to call every room and bring them down to safety. For 2 hours I had to be calm and all manager like, making sure everyone had what they needed, when inside, I wanted to curl up and cry. There were touch downs, just not at our exact location.
I knew at Scott's job, they have a safe place to be in emergencies, so I didn't worry.
He then tells me when he got home that they never stopped working.
AND THEN!!! Rebecca, Steven, and Lily were right in the heart of it!
Can't white people stay home in tornadoes!!! Am I the only one!!!!!
But once again, no one I know was hurt, and we survived. I ended up staying over at the hotel and watching Wrestlemania.
The Undertaker is done.
It was overwhelming.
I read this article the other day, and I can't recall to where something has spoken to me more.
Almost every one of them I could relate to.
People that are around Scott and I on a regular basis always say we should have our own show. I don't agree, we are very mundane, but our relationship is like no other I've known.
I complain about him a lot. He complains a lot about me.
It's been almost 13 years, ya'll.
He has faults, I have many faults.
Have I ever wanted to walk away? Yes I have. Could I ever walk away? No.
I'm in it for life. As much as I want to smother him while he sleeps, I truly cannot imagine a day without him.
Here is the article, and my comments.
23 Unromantic Signs That You’ve Found Your Soulmate
BY Kim Quindlen
1. You have a blast doing super boring stuff together, like grocery shopping, running to the pharmacy, or doing your taxes.
Ya'll. There is nothing more aggravating than going to the grocery store with Scott. JUST TODAY, he spent 13 minutes in the beer aisle. He compares all of the ketchup in a row trying to pick the best one. I grab and go. Apparently today I grabbed "cubed" ham instead of "diced" ham.
I have told him multiple times he is going to get kiddy-leashed to the shopping cart if he doesn't stop wandering off.
2. You have more fun eating takeout on the couch than you do dining out at a five-star restaurant.
YES x 1,000,000,000.
3. One of your favorite things about being with them is eating whatever the hell you want without worrying about looking cute.
Yes Lawd. So what if I had a three-day old ponytail whilst eating peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon? At least my binge eating is something I can do in front of him with only minimal judgement.
4. You somehow fall for them even more after you see their real, no holds barred, mouth-open sleeping face.
5. And you’re just as comfortable with them seeing yours… drool and all.
6. You can certainly appreciate one another when you’re all dressed up. But your favorite versions of each other are sweatpants, your favorite ratty old t-shirts, and no prep time.
He threatens to throw out my ratty old shirt. You know, I haven't seen it in a while....
7. You treasure their casual handwritten notes and cards more than the most expensive thing they’ve ever given you.
I have never admitted this to anyone, especially him, but I do keep almost everything that he writes to me.
8. They call you out when you need to be called out on something, and vice versa.
I do it more than he does, but I do appreciate it when he brings me back down to where I need to be. I wouldn't have any respect for him if he let me get away with all the things that I have done and said.
9. Your PDA is relatively nonexistent. At this point you have so much more fun with smirks across the table while sharing an inside joke, private smiles or goofy faces when you make eye contact across the room at a party, and any other communication you have in public that is shared only between the two of you.
We don't even have Private Displays of Affection, must less Public ones, haha.
10. They’re great at giving you pep talks, but they also refuse to coddle you.
11. You can openly talk – and laugh – about your bodily functions.
This is truly a daily event. The consistency of our poop, how many calories you burn when you fart, and him yelling "5 more!" every time he does it.
12. Sometimes your favorite part about going to weddings together is not the moving ceremony or the emotional toasts, but simply getting drunk together and acting like goofballs.
Now we don't drink outside of our home, but we are definitely not mushy lovey dovey people. We go to people watch and make fun of folks.
13. You’ve developed your own relationship lexicon: real or made-up words and phrases that have their own special meaning between the two of you.
No, I won't tell you what they are.
14. You know each other so well that you could probably answer correctly for them 9 out of 10 times in a celebrity edition round of Who would you rather?
15. Some of your ‘terms of endearment’ for one another are not terms of endearment at all. Rather, they’re nicknames like ‘nerd’ or ‘pal.’ And you actually prefer it this way.
Well ours are more R rated than "nerd" or "pal". They usually involve an F bomb and reproductive organs.
16. It doesn’t gross you out when they have the flu or get sick in some way, because you’re just focused on taking care of them.
I think we are more focused on getting each other better so we will both stop whining about it and going back to work.
17. You openly tell each other when you’re annoying the hell out of each other, and even though it’s based in truth, you can still laugh about it.
At least twice a day, "OMG Stop talking!"
18. You can hang out with them in silence without feeling weird about it.
19. In fact, chilling out with them in total quiet, without feeling the need to come up with small talk, is one of your favorite parts of being with them.
I also love having legit conversations about the things we love to argue about. Conspiracy theories, Creation, Evolution, history, and my lack of geographic knowledge. "THERE IS NO DAMN WAY THAT RUSSIA IS IS ASIA!!!!"
Fact: It is actually located in Europe and Asia, commonly known as "Eurasia". But whatever, I thought it was on top of Canada.
20. You’ll never betray each other by watching an episode of ‘your show’ on your own. You made a pact that the binge watching of this particularly series must be done together, and you both plan to stick to it.
This is why we are only in season 2 of Game of Thrones.
21. They buy you your favorite snack or candy at the convenience store more often than they give you flowers, and you wouldn’t change a damn thing.
Every time he goes :)
22. They make you laugh in extremely serious and inappropriate situations.
It is my absolute favorite thing about him.
23. You’d rather spend a super lame day with them than go on an over-the-top date with anybody else.
These are the days that I cherish.
Forget a perfectly posed+full makeup+hair just done+fake picture that commonly graces Facebook, this is us.
Real damn life.
I love how he understands my very lame and dry sense of humor, and I am grateful that he understands all of the outrageous things that go through my head, because I don't explain myself very well.
I asked him what is his absolute favorite thing about me, expecting a NSFW answer, and he said:
Well it's NSFW, so I can't put it on here.
Let us begin this week with seaweed. Because, why not?
I love seaweed. In my Love With Food Box, I received Mesquite BBQ flavor. I am not a fan of anything BBQ flavor, but I will try anything once.
Here we go.
I tried. BUT THEN!! I hear Scott walk in and I am like "HEY!!!!! Try something wonderful!!!!!"
I also dehydrated a bunch of zucchini and squash to make chips.
You may now carry on with your life.
I enjoy sports, binge watching TV, food, reading, and slightly bearded men.
Most popular blog posts from my previous Blog:
How I Died (Again)
Lily is Here!
The "Miracle" Diet
Zesty Lemon Shrimp
My Apologies to Shelby County, AL
The Evolution of My Hair
My Night Stalking Dale Murphy
The Worst Late Night Snack Ever
Questions from God