I have been on a roll lately with recipes.
I'm pretty much a professional cook now, yo.
Scott is working his one overnight shift for the month, so I usually don't cook anything, I just snack.
Tonight I made this, and it's a keeper!
What I used:
A bag of small, precooked, deveined shrimp
8 oz of cream cheese
4 tbl of Hellmann's mayo
Pepper, a shake of dried parsley, onion powder, paprika, and Sriracha
What I did:
I took the shrimp out of the freezer and threw them in a collander, then turned on MacGyver.
I took out a block of cream cheese, sat it on the counter, and finished MacGyver.
By then everything was thawed and at room temperature, so we're good to go.
I blended the cream cheese, and mayo until they were smooth. This took effort, I did it by hand whilst watching Scandal. I squeezed half of the lemon juice into the bowl and stirred some more. I added pepper, and the dried parsley, which by the way, has no flavor.
I tasted it, didn't really taste like anything, so I added some paprika and onion powder.
I chopped up the shrimp all Ree Drummond style because I was too lazy to set up the food processor.
I squeezed in the second half of the lemon, and then I mixed it all together, and ate it with these chips:
I liked it but it just needed some oomph.
Hellzyeah, I added Sriracha.
Stir it up, eat it up.
By the way if you come to my house, there is a bigass flamingo in the bathroom.
In typical Lisa-fashion, I found a recipe I liked, then butchered it until it resembled the original one almost ZERO.
I have no idea why I am like this as a person.
This is what I used:
2 Granny Smith apples, diced.
Maybe 1/4 cup of red onion. You're supposed to dice it, but I can't even.
2 cups of broccoli florets. From a bag, yo.
A big handful of shredded carrots.
1 cup of Hellmann's mayo. NOT 1/2 mayo 1/2 Greek yogurt. But you do you.
3 tbl of lemon juice.
I eliminated the cranberries (because, ew), and 1 TBL of sugar (because, diabetes)
I also added 2 TBL of sour cream and a handful of shredded sharp cheddar.
You don't have to be like me.
What I did:
I died, that's what. Scott was at work and I had to attempt to cut up the onion by myself.
It's a no from me. I diced the apples then added what little of onion I cut up. I didn't dice the onion because I wanted the flavor from the onion, but to NOT bite into a piece.
I then added the broccoli and carrots.
The best part? It called for chopped pecans. Now I watch Ree Drummond chop things all the time, with zero effort. Not only would I chop the tip of my finger off, nothing would turn out right.
I chopped the pecans in the most Lisa-way I could think of.
In a ziploc bag.
With a flash light.
I shook it all up, then added the "dressing".
Mayo, lemon juice, s&p.
I'm going to need my mother to look away.
Once it was all coated, I tasted it. It was good, but it just needed "something".
I added two tablespoons of sour cream, a handful of shredded sharp cheddar, and topped it with more pecans.
Whilst eating, I was thinking of all the things that I could add next time. Sunflower seeds, cubed sharp cheddar, bacon....
The opportunities are endless :)
10-ish years ago I remember making a Ham and Asparagus casserole for Scott. I didn't really dig it, so I assumed that I didn't like asparagus.
I kind of like asparagus.
I messaged *unnamed person* to confirm that I didn't like asparagus, LOL.
It's super easy to make.
Heat your oven to 425°.
I used a bunch? of asparagus. I just kept the middle part, I chopped off both of the ends.
A cup and a half of shredded Parmesan.
After the asparagus was prepped and washed, I put it in a ziploc bag with olive oil and shook it until it was completely coated. You must do a dance whilst coating it.
It's a rule.
Then add the s&p, garlic powder, and the cheese, then shake some more until it's complete coated.
Stick it on a coated pan and bake for 10 minutes.
It came out looking scrumptious, so I messaged *unnamed person*:
So there you go!
I ate it alongside blackened salmon.
I was convinced that I was not going to like this so I only took one picture.
However, they are happy for my tummy.
What I used:
2 lbs chicken tenders
Poultry seasoning (I have no idea what's in it)
Preheat the oven to 425°.
Dump the seasonings in a ziploc bag (as much as you will need to throughly coat the tenders), and shake shake shake. I did one tender at a time because of who I am as a person.
Wrap each tender in bacon, and place it on a coated pan.
Bake them for 35 minutes. I broiled them for an additional 3 minutes to make the bacon more crisp (insert Mama Grape quote), but it never quiet got it to where I wanted.
They were tasty, though.
Ya'll. It doesn't matter if you are low-carbing or not, you must try this.
I made this last night to go with my dinner. I ate the leftovers for breakfast, and I am about to go and make another batch.
1 cup of shredded Mozzarella
1/4 cup of shredded Parmesan
I put the two cheeses in a bowl, sprinkled garlic powder on top, stirred, added the egg, stirred.
I put parchment paper on a baking sheet, dumped the mixture onto it, used a spoon to press it flat into a circle-ish shape, and then shook just over a tablespoon of more garlic powder over it.
I stuck it in a 350° oven for just over 15 minutes.
I used a pizza cutter to slice it into cheese bread-like pieces, and ate it alongside my meat and cheese for dinner.
I needed a low carb dinner after the super stuffed lunch I had today.
This was quick and easy peasy, ready in the time it takes to cook a pack of bacon.
For the dip:
All you need is 16oz of sour cream, 2 cups of your favorite shredded cheese, a pack of dry Ranch dressing, and how much ever bacon you want, crumbled. You could even use bacon bits.
I take my bacon seriously.
Dump the sour cream into a bowl, mix in the cheese, Ranch powder, and bacon slowly.
Let it chill, then serve! I bet it would be delish atop a baked potato, or eaten with Town House crackers.
I went all low carby and just used a fork.
For the salmon:
I had a thawed piece of salmon I needed to use, so I mixed black pepper, onion powder, paprika, cumin, and chili powder, then seasoned both sides of the meat, then let it marinate while I was preparing everything else.
I then just cooked it though with a little bit of EVOO, and serve!
When you make the dip, don't be skimpy with the bacon. I am overzealous with bacon, so this time I only used about half of the pack. It definitely needed more, so when I eat the leftovers, I am going to add the rest of it.
So every once in a while, I find a recipe that looks good, I change a few things I don't like, and it ends up being a disaster.
Well this time I read a recipe, changed what I didn't like, and literally the only thing that stayed the same was I used chicken and green chilies.
I will post the original recipe, because normal people would probably like it.
This is what I used:
1 Rotisserie Chicken. Normal flavored?
1 small can of green chilis.
1 10 oz? can of Verde Enchilada sauce, I only used half.
I block of Queso cheese. The instructions said to cut it into cubes, add milk, microwave, stir, microwave, stir. I have no idea, Scott did this while I deboned the chicken.
1 shake of onion powder, and a shake of Lawrey's. Lawry's? I am not walking in there to see how it is spelled.
Remove bones, cartilage, and skin from the rotisserie. Eat the skin, discard the bones, give the cartilage to the dog.
Do whatever you need to do to have a melted block of white queso.
I covered the bottom of the skillet in a little bit of verde sauce and green chilis.
I then dumped in the chicken and stirred.
My Mother called. When I came back everything looked like this:
Since the chicken is already cooked, all you have to do it mix it all together and heat it up.
I was going to top mine with avocado, tomato, and jalapenos.
I only had one tomato, and I need it for something else, and Scott couldn't find the jalapenos, so......
It is packed full of flavor from the chilies and Verde sauce, but definitely doctor it up. Sour cream is a must.
Of course it would have been heavenly wrapped up in some flour tortillas and smothered in cheese, but....carbs.
Here is the original that I butchered:
Ya'll. This was the absolute best. When I read the ingredients, I thought meh, how special could it be?
Wrong, space ranger. It was amazing.
It's super easy to make, with ingredients you probably already have.
1 lb of lean ground beef
6 slices of bacon
1 onion (I used yellow)
8 oz shredded cheddar (I used sharp)
6 dill pickle spears
1/2 cup mayo
Garlic powder, s&p, Lawry's seasoning
1/2 cup of Half and Half
Now, before you begin. The recipe I had originally said 1/4 cup of chopped onion. Ya'll know I can't chop veggies right, so I put the entire onion in the processor, and pulsed until it was mush. I knew it would evaporate when I cooked it, so no worries.
One more thing- buy good bacon. I bought a cheap $3 pack, KNOWING BETTER, and it was just meh.
I convinced myself that while I was browning the beef and onion, that I could just throw the bacon in the oven to cook simultaneously and that it would be okay.
Don't be like me. Cook it in a skillet.
Heat your oven to 350°.
Brown the meat and onion. I seasoned it generously with s&p, Lawry's, and garlic powder.
Cook the bacon.
I put 6 pickle spears in the processor and pulsed.
Of course you can just chop them up, but I am lazy.
Drain the beef, the bacon, then add the pickles to the beef/onion/chopped bacon.
Stir, then dump it into a baking dish.
Sprinkle the cheese over the meat/onion/pickle mixture.
Take 3 eggs, the mayo, and the half and half, and stir the mess out of it.
Pour it over the meat/pickle mixture, and bake it for 30 minutes.
When it came out of the oven, I meant to take a picture.
Scott had already dug into it and I said "WAAAIIITTTT!!!".
He covered up the missing chunk with his dirty work hands and went "HERE!!" LOLOL.
This is so so yummy. You get bites of the cheese, the pickle, the pulsed onion....
If you're the kind of person that enjoys biting into onion, chopped it the way to go.
I am not that person.
You can also tell the difference between Scott and I.
I used a real bowl, and garnished mine with more cheese, and some of the rest of the bacon that I cooked.
He used a Cool Whip bowl, and slathered it in ketchup.
Your taste buds will thank you.
Do you ever do something that you know is going to hurt, but you do it anyway?
I don't like salsa in food. I love it with chips in a restaurant, but that is it.
I have put it in many recipes, and I hate it every time.
Why did I think I would like this?
It is very good, don't get me wrong.
I made it, let it set for around 30 minutes, it was good, but kind of meh.
I added a block of softened cream cheese, and tried it again the next day.
I was even better, but still kind of meh. It was the salsa that I didn't like.
What I used:
16 oz sour cream
A few shakes of dill weed
Garlic powder, onion powder, and Kosher salt
1/2 cup of salsa (I just realized that I put way too much)
2 cups of shredded Mexican blend cheese
On day two I added a softened block of cream cheese.
I kept adding the seasonings until it tasted right.
It has much potential.
I originally tried it with traditional tortilla chips, but these?!?!? The bombdigitty.
It is no secret that I over complicate things.
Call it a gift.
I had some chicken and potatoes that I needed to use, and my sister sent me this recipe, but not exactly what I am going to share with you today.
It called for bone in chicken with the skin. I had boneless, skinless chicken thighs, so I knew that they wouldn't cook for as long and at the temperature that the potatoes would.
I decided to cook the potatoes in the oven and the chicken in a skillet, and just prepare them the same.
You would think it would work out, right?
If you make this, it can easily all be seasoned together, thrown in a pan, and baked together if your chicken is bony and skinny.
I am SO funny.
Also, you MUST add Lawry's seasoning. When we were eating, it tasted lovely, but it was missing something.
Scott (of course) suggested Lawry's, and when he went back for seconds, he added it, and it was indeed missing the awesome sauce. Well, the awesome seasoning.
What I used:
5 boneless, skinless chicken thighs
4 small white potatoes
A handful of diced onion
What I did:
Turn on the oven to 425°.
Wash and dry the potatoes, cut them into small quarters, then throw this many diced onions in there:
Then add in a heaping tablespoon of minced garlic, Kosher salt, pepper, paprika, and oregano.
Then........gasp......mix it all together with your hands.
Lay it out on a pan, and stick it in the oven.
Now....it said to cook on 425° for 45 minutes.
I checked at 30 minutes.....
The garlic and onion were burned to a crisp. The potatoes were perfect.
I coated the chicken thighs in olive oil, s&p, paprika, oregano. DON'T FORGET THE LAWRY'S!!!
I cooked them in a skillet on med-high til the salmonella was gone.
I turned the oven back on to 350°, placed the cooked chicken and potatoes in (another) pan, drizzled a tad bit more olive oil and paprika, and stuck them in the oven for 15 minutes.
I mainly did this because Scott got off later than usual, and I wanted everything to be warm, and to give the potatoes a little more "pop".
I enjoy sports, binge watching TV, food, reading, and slightly bearded men.